Saturday, July 3, 2010

The Morning After

July 3, 2010
I was up at 4 this morning after collapsing last night. I opened my eyes an my first though was that I needed to go check on my angel. (Molly always slept on my chest or if we had a night nurse she would rock with her all night and I would wake during the night and go to her room to check on them) It took just a moment to remember that this morning was so different. I can't pick her up and hold her today. My arms feel empty. I am so sad for me and so happy for her all in the same moment.
I knew that I could not just lay in bed and that I would not go back to sleep, so up and out to walk the neighborhood. It is so muggy and gray this morning. It started to rain and there were too many clouds to see a beautiful sunrise like the one we watched yesterday. Thank you dear Lord for giving my they beautful morning that we had yesterday. It is fitting that today would be gray and raining.
I have already been sitting in her room, taking out the beautiful clothes that she never wore to pack away. I hope that on day we will be blessed with another little girl and hopefully she will be able to wear all of these things. I hope that I will be able to pull them out again and even though Molly never wore them, they are hers and I will be reminded of her as a dress a little sister in them.
It is crazy and busy at our house and I am thankful for that. There are so many things to do and I don't have time to think about any one thing too long. This is how I will move on for now. I know so many of you that read this worry about me (I worry about me and the family too) and I want you all to know that we will be ok with time. God will heal us and he has a plan. Your love will heal us. I have a plan too - we will see if it fits with God's. It is to remember to make the most of each day and not to make excuses. We are here for such a short time and we need to make a difference. It is too easy to just sit in front of the TV or computer, too easy just to stay home and relax.
Continue to pray for us all! Thank you! Funeral plans are the post below.

6 comments:

  1. You do not know me, nor I you, and yet your life has touched my soul. From one mother to another, we are able to relate and know each other through the love we have for our children. My heart hurts for you and we share fallen tears for the same little angel that touched the lives of many, as she is a reminder of the blessings we have been given from our Heavenly Father. None of us know the amount of time we will be given with them. Your angel is all of our constant reminder to make the very most of each day and be thankful for the moments and memories created. My older sister lost her youngest daughter to a drunk driver. She had barely turned 18 and just started her senior year in high school. I know from seeing my sister that there is no greater loss in this world than the loss of your own child. But I have also seen firsthand all the wonderful blessings that have come from the life lived then lost. I have seen souls saved and people united from my beautiful niece's passing. Your faith already puts you a step ahead and I believe the Lord will honor that. You are an inspiration to all who hear about your journey, and Molly's as well. The name Molly means "Righteous." Isaiah 26:9 says "My soul yearns for you in the night; in the morning my spirit longs for you. When your judgments come upon the earth, the people of the world learn righteousness." Your daughter stood for righteousness, and will be a great reminder and teacher of how we should all aspire to live righteously. She has left her footprint on the hearts of many, even on souls she did not know, and your generosity in sharing her with us will impact so many more. May the Lord wrap His loving arms around you, bring you peace, and fill you with joy once again. I will keep you & your family in my prayers.
    Lynette E. Theisen
    Aubrey, TX

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  2. I have no words to say...nothing profound to type. Just to say that you are loved and that for as fiercely as you loved your little Molly...God loves her even MORE. And He is taking good care of her until you two can play together in Heaven...where everything will be perfect. Love and hugs from across cyberspace.

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  3. I am so sorry for your loss. I will be praying for you and your family.

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  4. I love you Teresa. I am here for you.

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  5. Teresa - May the Peace that passes all understanding keep your heart and mind through Christ Jesus.

    I am sorry we can not be there tomorrow but am thankful we could say our goodbye's last week. Thank you for sharing that time with Dan and I and the neighbors. We love you and our thoughts and prayers are with you, Kelly, Brighton and your family, always.

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  6. Sorry for your loss...My prayers are with you..
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